Orthodox JEWISH WEDDING.
A modern Orthodox Jewish couple, preparing for a religious
wedding meet with their rabbi for counseling. The rabbi asks
if they have any last questions before they leave.
The man asks, "Rabbi, we realize it's tradition for men to
dance with men, and women to dance with women at the
reception. But, we'd like your permission to dance
together, like the rest of the world."
"Absolutely not," says the rabbi. "It's immodest. Men and
women always dance
separately."
"So after the ceremony I can't even dance with my own wife?"
"No," answered the rabbi. "It's forbidden."
"Well, okay," says the man, "What about sex? Can we finally
have sex?"
"Of course!," replies the rabbi. "Sex is a mitzvah - a good
thing within
marriage, to have children!"
"What about different positions?" asks the man.
"No problem," says the rabbi. "It's a mitzvah!"
"Woman on top?" the man asks.
"Sure," says the rabbi. "Go for it! It's a mitzvah!"
"Doggy style?"
"Sure! Another mitzvah!"< /STRONG>
"On the kitchen table?"
"Yes, yes! A mitzvah!"
"Can we do it on rubber sheets with a bottle of hot oil, a
couple of
vibrators, a leather harness, a bucket of honey and a porno
video?"
"You may indeed. It's all a mitzvah!"
"Can we do it standing up?"
" No." says the rabbi."
"Why not?" asks the man.
"Could lead to dancing"
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